I woke up early and decided we should go some where public.
You are still being odd – i cant understand why you wont say anything.
You keep smiling at my oddly
My brain at this point seems unable to register the mixture of sadness, fear and pity that is showing on your face
The day passes in an odd blur, you keep telling me you feel sick.
I buy you some jeans and a new top.
I finally face my fear and take you to Costa and sit you down.
You tell me your not happy.
You haven’t been for a while.
You have feeling for someone else.
She can give you what you want.
Nothing has happened
You don’t know what you want.
You are worried i have been unhappy too.
You want us to take some time to think, are we really happy?
We will take a week, we will think.
NOTHING will happen with her.
We will working this out with grace and respect.
All the while you say these things my mind is falling…. falling…..
I CANT UNDERSTAND
I have been happy
I love you
I moved away from all my family and friends for you.
I trusted you
I was honest, faithful, caring, loving.
WHAT HAVE I DONE???????
I’m staring at you and i feel so scared.
So so scared…………
And worst of all looking back i also felt the cruelest of all things –