Today i woke after dreaming of him.
It started as a lovely dream – he told me he loved me – then she walked in the room – he started telling me i was fat, ugly and that he hated me (all things he was told me during this horrific time)
I wake up and I’m crying
I cry from 7.30 am till 11.30 am – i cry in the shower, i cry on the bathroom floor, i cry on the kitchen floor.
I cant stop it, Why cant i stop it??????????
Everything hurts – when i heard of heart break before this i always thought it was emotional pain – i never knew that was an actual physical ache.
There’s an actual ache in my chest.
I don’t see how i can keep doing this.
For the rest of the day i’m surrounded by fog.
This is HELL