I have called my parents to tell them a little of what has happened.
My dad sounds disappointed in me, he doesn’t understand why i don’t hate him. He seems to think i should be throw plates and destroying all his stuff.
He had me call the landlady – she has thrown her husband out a year ago for cheating – she has been amazing. Shes going to make sure i get the deposit back – she also said that he cant move her in.
Mother thinks i should come home and live in the dinning room.
But i don’t want to do that.
I’m miss him so so much, i want him back. Not the monster that visits me in evening takes anything from me he wants and leave. I miss the man who proposed to me. I miss the man who would heat up my wheatie dog when i had cold feet. I miss the kisses full of love rather than the function ones we now have.
I have failed – none of my brothers or sisters have divorced!
What was wrong with me?
I read today that Kelly Brooks (UK TV personality) husband has been sleeping with other women. Shes so skinny and pretty – there really is no hope for me.
He told me i was too fat, too ugly, not interesting enough, i hate myself.
I don’t know how to fix this.
I Feel so utterly broken.